It took a little longer to be “cleared” and given permission to come home with our new baby, and we hadn’t told a whole lot of people at church, etc that we were doing this in case there was a change of mind so when we showed up with a baby some people were in awe that I hid it so easily and looked so good afterward!
Our Mason James was a blessing. A healing gift on a day that I hated with all my heart for many years. A reminder of God’s perfect timing and his unfailing love. A reminder that even at a young age a person can make a pleasing decision for the Lord. A reminder that blessing can come from a “mistake” and that God means Good for all things.
My Mason James changed me entire thought on abortion and teenage mothers. I now believe that there is absolutely no room for abortion after being blessed from a right choice and knowing how few babies there are to adopt in our country (because so many are being aborted). I do not discount the worldly fact that it is a woman’s choice, but above that, our Lord has the power to place babies in wombs or NOT to place babies on wombs and it is HIS life and HIS power that should not be trumped.
I now feel that teenage mothers are blessed. Blessed with youth, blessed with the ability to obtain skills to parent their children and I have met several who have risen to the occasion and overcame their circumstances and are great mothers. I do not speak poorly of them now because I am proud of them for choosing life-in a culture where children are burdens, expendable and legally able to be killed.
Our lives changed dramatically and we often laugh at ourselves through the lens of looking at our friends who become first time parents. We had no idea how things would change. I still remember Jeff sitting on the couch telling his mom that we were still going to make time to do the things we enjoyed.
“Gretchen will still ride her horse and I’ll still go hunting.” There have been more than a few occasions that I’ve wanted to snarl at that comment retroactively. There have been more than a few occasions when I brought that comment up. I used to ride my horse at least twice a week. Sometimes more. I have ridden, to date, four time this year. And it’s almost December, so the outlook isn’t looking real peachy.
Jeff still went hunting and life pretty much carried on as normal for him for quite some time and I was so jealous. But I love being a mom!
Mason’s adoption was finalized in October of 2008 and we breathed a sigh of relief. He kept growing and changing and we enjoyed every minute with him. I was still working, I guess in my mind to “pay for the adoption.” I was throwing some ideas around of how to be with my young child more.
The child I waited 10 years for.
The child that God gave me.